I read somewhere the other day that women sometimes had heart attacks when they broke up with a significant other. Perhaps it was people in general. I can’t be certain but it makes me wonder about the pain of relationships and the actual physical damage this pain could do. The heart pain is so bad that it makes you believe you will never ever survive it even if you remind yourself a billion times a day that it will get better in time. It seems to hit in waves of remembrance which feel like waves of actual physical pain starting in your heart and then sometimes flowing out into your chest. You have a hard time breathing for a moment. You feel a certain panic filling your thoughts. It is hard to detach and practice Buddhist breathing or even to remind yourself why you can’t be with the other person. When you love someone you love them and that’s all there is to it. Funny who we chose to love…I don’t completely understand the whys or the hows of it. I think, for me, there is a “child” connection where I feel an instinctive connection with a person and that connection feels safe to me. When the connection is broken I feel as if I have suddenly lost my best friend.