Lucky Tree

Staanly in his true clothes

Open Window to see what’s out there….

So I was in Arizona over the weekend with the love of my life and an amazing thing happened. We were playing golf on a nice course and had reached the fourth hole only to find the foursome ahead of us was delayed by another group ahead of them and so we were sitting there in our cart waiting. I was humming. Ted was thinking. We were holding hands. Suddenly I felt someone looking at me. Maybe most people don’t notice this but I always do. It’s a weird kind of feeling almost as if someone is tapping you gently on the shoulder. You don’t recognize what it is, at first. I turned slowly expecting to find someone had walked up to our tee. Seeing no one, I figured I had been wrong. Then I felt it again. I looked around but this time looked down. There I saw him: the most charming Roadrunner I have ever met. A bird that appeared to have no discomfort at being this close to a human. I spoke to him and he cocked his head and waved his head feathers at me like a small and delicate fan. I kept talking to him in a singsong voice and he responded by walking up and down in front of me and stopping every five seconds or so to unveil his coxcomb while tilting his head. Ted and I were speaking in normal tones while this was going on. Neither of us could believe what we were seeing as these birds never stop and are rarely known as being friendly to humans. I don’t remember how this little love scene ended but I was entranced. I felt as if I had been chosen by a spirit and anointed the favorite one.

My friend was so funny about my bird love: he said he expected to find my roadrunner in our bed when we got back to the hotel. I think he’s jealous! My point here is just when you think there is no way you will find the love of your life, he appears. Not the road runner, though he was also wonderful. I am talking about your perfect companion, your life time lover, your “watch your back” person that you long for. Never give up! You never know when the road runner will come around….Mine did a few months ago and I feel as if I am living another life! I guess I am very lucky that my dream came true and I think it was because I never gave up on romance.

rosie and stanley

Image via CrunchBase

Remembering Something You Thought You Wouldn’t Again

I believe in love and second chances. I believe in the power of memory. I love to reflect on whom I might have married or where I might have lived. I love nothing more than a glance from an attractive man in a public place which says to me “I am interested.”

What I love most of all, however, is the return of a flirtation you thought you had lost and the possibility of an old passion being rekindled.

There is nothing better in life than friendship begun at age four which continues to flourish. Nothing finer than an old designer piece which you wore at 30 still cupping your shoulders with certainly and still making you feel great.

I prefer the old to the new. I prefer the childhood memories to many new memories. I find the thought of an erotic encounter which took place at 24 infinitely more erotic in my mind today than any new ones I might have, except with one single man!

The art of writing romantic letters is seemingly lost today but I have been experiencing it recently with the greatest of pleasure. Imagine before going to sleep that you receive an email from someone you thought you had lost many years ago and that email was filled with love and remembrances of your past together, even painting a bit of what might be in future?

Imagine how that feels? How happy it makes you to think someone else many miles away is having the same thoughts you are having. Isn’t life grand? The really amazing thing is if you have no attachment to the outcome and only feel the joy of love, you can enjoy it even more.

Each little sound bite being sent electronically over IPAD’s  day to day add to the wonderful building and waxing and waning tension of this feeling of love and desire yet there may be no consummation. I think I have learned one lesson in life after all these years: don’t live in a fantasy state particularly when starting out in a relationship or the hope of a relationship. It’s a bad idea.  Really looking and listening and understanding what the other person is about is a good thing. Feeling giddy is a really good thing. Having hope is an even better thing. Holding hands is the best thing in the whole world even when it is done electronically.

The soft sweep of fall is upon us even here in California. The skies darken earlier each day and the light of the summer sun taunts us with her retreat over the rusty mountains. I think everyone feel a little bit sad as winter approaches in their own knowing of the darkness ahead. It’s a time for adding blankets to the bed, buying wood, making soup, cleaning gutters, sorting through summer clothes and storing them in the cedar closet which no one has anymore. It’s a time for seeking out the comfort of old friends and dogs who love you.

Early in the morning one   can see the tendrils of vegetable smoke curling up from the nests of brambles along the path to town. Look closely at the departing night sky when you go out to get the paper. Stop and watch the spider weaving her web and resist any temptation to tear it down.

Things are turning brown all around us and there seems to be little rebirth. Today my banker asked if I wanted to invest in a five year bond and I declined. All we have is the moment, our breath, the ones we love and a great capacity for joy.