I think I used to be like a cactus but I have changed. I don’t mind so much being touched now and actually can hold hands at will.Coming upon a cactus is a bit like coming upon a rattlesnake: lovely to look at but deadly to touch. Having a cactus on your sink under the winter sun is a good thing. You don’t even have to remember to water it. If you look at the cactus and remember where it came from you can imagine leaving your own desert for an oasis. Creating your own mystical oasis is a good thing. If you have one you can go there any time without using frequent flyer miles. It doesn’t involve waiting in security lines or endless travel to and from airports. You can also create mystical relationships where you never actually see or touch the person you love. This is a safer way to live and love another. If you do this in place of real and present love, however, you may end out forgetting what it feels like to actually hold a hand when you want to. If you forget this you may forget how to breathe.
Archive for poetry
ah the cactus…
My Madrid Man
so I met this guy in Madrid and asked if I could take his picture. He smiled as if he did this all the time and posed against his car. I really liked this guy as he was so comfortable with himself. He lived in a town where everyone was a little unusual but I liked it there. It wasn’t as if people were mean or weird, they were themselves. Maybe there is something in the air in Madrid that allowed its townspeople to be happy just with what they had. Painting their houses red and blue, placing signs on their flowerpots, cowboy boots on their graves and making a world of hot color hues. I think you should visit Madrid and if you find my Madrid man, tell him thank you for making me believe there were still guys like him out there.
Braid
Sometimes I wonder what my braid looks like and so I had a friend take a picture of it. I was surprised to see there were some gray hairs running through it. I have no idea why this surprised me as I am 60 and should have a few gray hairs. When my mother got cancer the chemo treatment made her hair fall out. I could see her hair was not completely gray and she was 87 years old so perhaps I have inherited a “saving money on hair color gene”.I don’t really mind about the gray hair which concerns my hairdresser. It seems most people who color their hair want to completely remove the gray hair. I have no desire to do that as I feel the gray strands are like the silver threads in poems: I like the feel of them. Rougher to the touch than colored hair, they remind me of the hard times I have been through. Each time I go to see my hairdresser she spends some time pulling up the many layers of my hair and clucking in a low and concerned voice. LAst time I saw her she commented on the fact there was a lot more gray in there.I guess that’s why I wanted my braid photographed. I wanted to see. I like the feel of this braid as it has stayed constant over the years. The weight of it has lightened but the complicated and bumpy feel of it on the back of my head soothes me. Sometimes I don’t comb it out for a couple of days as I like the messy way it looks after a good night’s rest. I am slightly shocked at my behavior when I do this as it seems very naughty. Something an old hippie might do…I find hair interesting . Once you decide to let it do what it really wants to do your life is infinitely easier.
What’s Important
The morning
coffee
the affection of dogs
sunshine
honesty
paying your bills especially when the payee needs the money
breathing
remembering to breathe
smiling
making others smile
being truthful
being faithful
taking yourself out to where you want to go
knowing where you want to go
admiring other people who are smarter than you
admiring other people for any reason
listening without adding your own experience
learning to just sit there and listen to nothing
giving away a lot of stuff you find you really don’t need.
feeling like you don’t need a lot of stuff
giving away dollar bills to kids for their UNICEF boxes
not reacting when people act in ways that are inappropriate
not reacting to any bad behavior
not looking to see what is in the hand outstretched towards you
